During labor : hypnobirth breathing technique

There's a blog i always follow asking on labor breathing technique, so I figure, let's share the hypnobirth way!

well, there's three types of breathing.All to be used at the different phases of labor.

First - the relaxation breathing. This is used, well, as the name recommends, to relax. Aside from when contraction hits, or delivering the baby, this type of breathing is to be used at all times.And best of all, this can be used well after labor. In your everyday life, when you are tensed, feel that temper raising, horrible bowel movement while waiting for your loo turn (heheheheh), use this technique
Technique : breathe in through the nose while quietly counting from one to seven (macam kira satu saat, dua saat tiga saat), then breathe out through the nose again, while quietly counting from one to seven. the key here is to focus on the counting. This helps distract you from the pain.

Second - while having contraction. Once you feel a contraction coming,use this breathing. It's a very slow breathing, and requires practise. It is best to practise 4 weeks before your EDD.
Technique : breathe in through your nose, while quietly counting from one to eight, the VERY, VERY SLOWLY release (breathe out) while quietly counting from one to TWENTY. When I first started, by the fourteen count dah habis dah breathe out semua udara. hahaha that's why one must practise this technique earlier. But, do not cheat and hold your breath semata2 nak sampaikan kiraan 20 tu. you must slowly release the air. This technique makes your body totally relax n lembut, so you will not clench or keraskan your body when contraction comes. Bila badan keras contraction becomes even more painful. So dont grab that bed railing (or your husband's arm ahahha), instead lembutkan badan and relax, slowly breathe sampai contraction passed.
Birth partner/husband's role : husband's can play their part in this technique. Discuss with your husband what signal to use to show you're having contraction. Cuit tgn ke, tepuk tilam ke.so he will know what you are experiencing at the moment. try not to talk, because this takes your energy and distract your concentration. Husbands can then help by counting 1-8, then 1-20, to help you to stay focus and back on track. Having assistance like this help prevent you from 'losing it'

Third : when pushing the baby out. Really, this one is the trickiest as it is opposite from what hospitals practise. In hypnobirth, you are recommended to breathe out the baby, and not use your might to push out. But, best follow your doctor since I am not a liscenced hypnobirth trainer. Still, I shall share the method anyway.
Technique : breathe in while quietly (dalam hati) counting from one to seven. Then breathe out quickly as if you are breathing the baby out. This also requires practise, and best part is, the only almost real situation when you can practise is when pooping. hehehhe infact, when you are done delivering the baby, this technique can still be used everytime you poop! hahahah! When you are on the toilet seat feeling an urge to pass motion, breathe in counts of eight, then breathe down! this way, your body is relaxed and not stiff/clenched, so passing is easier.
This works,really. go try.hahahah

nota kaki : i wouldnt recommend holding your breathe at any time as oxygen supply is crucial to keep baby calm and oxygen sampai to baby's brain. I also wouldnt recommend breathing through the mouth as it tires you out faster and tekak/mulut cepat kering.pastu dahaga. Also I wouldnt recommend breathing in gulps of air, because it makes you kelam kabut and breathing tak smooth. I feel that steady and consistant breathing helps keep baby calm and relaxed, so dia lahir pun relax saja tak marah marah.

InsyaAllah, practising hypnobirth breathing shall ease the delivery process by a mile, and help you stay relaxed and calm. You wont even remember to ask for epidural, because you are too busy focusing on your breathing, counting, and trusting your body's ability to birth naturally.

Good luck dear ceeramoon. May Allah Swt Makes it easy for you.Amin.

I'm back, post raya!

This is unbelievably short cos I am already in the office and work is keeping me busy.
After the long raya silence, I am back and has steadily put back on the weight I lost during Ramadhan. pftt.
Okay gotta get back to work. Laters!

Selamat tinggal Ramadhan 1433H

Assalamualaikum wbt

Saya dengan rendah hati ingin memohon ampun dan maaf kepada sahabat/keluarga yang membaca blog ini atas segala kesilapan dan kekhilafan saya sepanjang kita berhubungan.

Setiap tahun pun sedih rasa bila Ramadhan nak tinggalkan kita. Especially bila amal ibadah saya tak seberapa mana. Cabaran tahun ni lebih sikit sebab ada toddler, dan sebab saya tak bersedia terlebih dahulu. Menyesal tak ikut nasihat kakak saya, prepare for Ramadhan, those who simply stumbles upon Ramadhan without gearing up for it first will find themselves unprepared.
Astaghfirullahalazim.

Tahun ini betul2 berharap dalam hati supaya tahun depan lebih baik,lebih baik,lagi kualiti ibadah dan pengisian Ramadhan. Istajib dua anaa ya Allah!

Kegembiraan saya menyambut raya adalah kerana ahli keluarga ada bersama. Rindu pada adik beradik n mak. Tapi x dpt menutup terkilan hati kerana x kuat melawan nafsu utk beribadah.

Kepada Ustazah Wan Jah, walaupun tak membaca blog ini, terima kasih. Atas usaha anda, insyaAllah ramai orang mendapat hidayah mendapat ilmu.
Ustazah kak wan selalu sebut dalam doa beliau,
"Ya Allah, jadikanlah aku penyebab orang lain mendapat hidayah"
setiap kali sampai part situ airmata dia mengalir.
ya Allah, Kau Berilah pahala setimpal kepada Kak Wan atas usahanya, Kau Permudahkanlah dakwahnya dan Kau Lindungilah dia selalu.
Semoga tahun depan kak Wan bantu saya lagi untuk bersedia awal.

Ustazah Wan Jah juga menyebut, hiasilah malam raya dengan berqiamullail. Kerana malam raya adalah malam2 yang doa paling makbul. Dan dimana pahala mencurah2.
wallahualam.sekadar berkongsi. Semoga saya menjadi penyebab orang lain mendapat hidayah.
Amin.

Sedih sungguh hati ini. tapi menyesal tiada berguna.
Ustazah saya juga pesan jangan sombong meminta kepada Allah, oleh itu, permintaan saya,

Ya Allah, Kau Temukanlah aku dengan Ramadhan tahun hadapan dan berikutnya.
Istajib dua ana, Ya Allah....

Teaching your baby to swim

I started teaching Maryam to swim at the age of 10 months old.
Let's share on what I have dug up so far from the teaching-baby-to-swim sites I've been researching on.

- when parents take kids to the pool, they normal allow the kids only in wading pools.
Well, if u decide to teach them to swim, dont. They need to learn in the adult pool, with the parents/parent. And do you know the big pool is better for babies since the water circulation is better, so its cleaner than the wading pool. This goes without saying actually, since you know the difference of the color of water in both.Heh.

- do not use float. Like I mention in my previous related entry, I was looking for the neck float at first before I found out there's no need for this.Float gave your child false sense of security, then they wouldnt know how to react in cases of emergencies (hold their breath etc etc)

-SUPER COMMON misconception - just throw them in the water, they will naturally swim.
Not true, well , unless the baby youre trying to teach is your pet fish!
I get sooo aggravated with this one cause when most people see us training maryam at the public pool they would say "orang putih campak je anak diorang dalam air ""the westerners simply throw their babies in the water"
oi.gila ke.these are babies, not fishes ye. Teach n train them first. I am sorry Im letting myself get emotional on this.So stupid. Campak je. Pfft.

- common mistakes people make when they see us with maryam in the adult pool is to bring their kids (3,4,5 years old) into the deep end, expecting them to be calm.
And comparing the kid to maryam "tengok baby tu, relax je,awak yang besar ni penakut"
Let me throw you, who cant swim to save your life, in the middle of the sea and see how you fare. Another pfft moment. poor kid will be screaming and kicking about trying to get out.

-some parent waits until laters to teach, since swimming for babies is not common here. But the older they get the harder it will be due to natural fear of water. for Maryam, swimming has made her a water buff. Or probably that's her natural character. Nonetheless, it makes bath time easy. She wont fret if you pour water down her face, or a few times, try to dip her face into the bath tub. in the west they start as early as 2 weeks after birth, using heated pools. I know my friends who bring their babies to the pool at four months old

-to get them comfortable in the water, make full use of the baby bathtub. Most people ditch the baby bathtub once their babies are able to stand (supported). Maryam still uses hers until now although its a bit small for now. We are planning to get a bigger plastic tub for her bath time. I feel babies learn a lot during bathtime. A water buff myself, bath time should be made longer and funner, and not "cepat la keluar, apa buat lagi dalam tu!" i enjoy bathing Maryam, Safya my niece and Ilyas my nephew together when we go back kampung.super fun!

- learn the right method and have faith! these are the most important if you,cheap like myself are going to teach them swimming. There's a command to use which is "*insert baby's name*, ready, go" which is commonly used by most sites. I even use a certain voice so she can anticipate that she's going to be submerged under water or have water pour down her head in a moment. of course now she is talking, whenever i call her name using my 'instructor' *ahem* voice, she would say "yeady" and then "go". super funny. Do not start teaching once you have researched up on this and watch related videos. This is also for safety reasons

-and of course, have faith, believe in your baby's potential. the first time I was going to dunk her, i was so scared. what if she swallowed, what if she breathe the water in.
but when she came up relaxed, and reach out for her toy, you knew this baby is smarter than you think! ahhahahah

-know her signals.respect her cues. if she does not want to continue, if she fusses, then stop. this is suppose to be fun for her. and there's always other times to teach.dont rush her.

Look up here and enjoy!

Teaching your baby : baby learn the quran!

I love to sing. Fortunately, I am fully aware that I have no talent whatsoever to speak of. So when I became pregnant with Maryam, I knew that's my ready audience right there!

I started singing to her in the early days. Incy wincy spider, 25 rasul, the salawat, ol tok dolah has a farm, twinkle2, one two buckle my shoe.and the list go on and on. there was no stopping the karaoke song list!

We also got her lots of soft books and baby books with hard pages.

But we did neglect to teach her the quran. it was my elder sister, who is my other guru *and also maryam's ibu susuan, love!* aside from my mom, who introduced me to Islamic Parenting Network! and how they start teaching children to read the quran at a very young age.

As you know, I teach Maryam to swim on my own to avoid the expensive swimming classes fees *cheaaaapppp* but i truly decided to teach her the Quran because I want her to learn the basic of reading Arabic, and tajweed from me, myself!I have been observing that most parents find it a must to send their child to learn the Quran from a teacher at around 6 to 7 years because they feel they cant teach the kids themselves.
I say different. We started having a tajweed class organized at work once a week this year and the primary reason we decided to do so is so that we can teach our own children. The ustazah is one of our officers who is certified by the Johor Islamic Council to teach. We couldnt be more proud! Allah has made the path so easy for us. A certified tajweed teacher among us. Masha Allah!

I bought the package for 12-18 year old children from here. The package consist of many items but the one i like best is the flashcards! Maryam loves it to.
Islamic Parenting Network says that its best to start teaching at the age of 10 months. We startes Maryam at 12. I feel its okay. Now that you know, of course its best to start em young but if you just find out, start now no matter what age your child is.

Another helpful teaching material *although not necessarily the best, i think* are the learning hijaiyah alphabet youtube videos. Maryam loves them, albeit overly much. She would say " Ba ta sa, ba ta sa! apet!which really means iPad.sigh "
I'd say try to recite the alphabet to the baby yourself, and use the youtube videos when the situation really calls for it! Here's to hoping our children wont become apet iPad addicts T______T

The thing about babies is there is so much things to teach them and they wont get confused or burdened or stressed out. unlike us, old people hahahaha
But of course mengajarlah dengan fun, lembut and penuh kasih sayang. Let them move at their own pace. Learning should be fun and a lifelong process!

To me the idea of early education is not to push them babies incessantly, acting like crazy, anal parents.

Its about assisting your child to learn as much as they are capable of, achieve their most potentil, instead of wasting their time on their backs, staring at the ceiling.

we can do it moms!insyaAllah!

Early education : how early is EARLY?

My mom is passionate about early education for infants.
But having ten children, close in age, she did not have enough time to train each babies.
She however manage to fully practise training infants on one of my brother, the seventh child.
And she said his progress was much faster than the rest of us, which is to say a lot since non of us are slow or lagging compared to other babies.
She said my brother was not necessarily a genius, only trained.
and that has been my tagline when preaching early education to friends. trained or untrained?
I remember her using this book called How to Have a Brighter Child. Mom said it was by an australian author.I looked it up online tp tak jumpa.
.
.
Well, you can only imagine how paranoid she became when my sister got pregnant with her first grandchild. she went an bought a book on early education for my sister.

'how to have a smarter baby' by Dr. Susan Ludington-Hoe. *i suck at uploading photos.bear with me.google it up will ya!*

Naturally when I got pregnant, my mom n sister couldnt stop pestering me enought to prepare for baby's early education
So I bought a copy of the same book and start reading.
.
.
Early education for babies actually starts from the day she was born. Its easy for us to assume that infants do not understand much and teaching should start well after they became toddlers.
Well, this is how parents lose the most precious period of their babies lives!
Early education is all about starting early.
Human beings absorbs n learns faster in the first two months of our lives.
The rate gets lower but is still very high in the first six months.
and then it just gradually decreases.
Which explains why its hard for us to absorb new things when we are older.
and why babies absorb like a sponge!
one classic mistake about early education is it burdens the baby.


" i dont want to push them too early, imagine the pressure they face having to learn so much at such a tender age, oh, why overeact on it, babies are babies, just focus on their growing up, then start teaching them"


do you know that infants and babies loooove to learn. they just have the thirst for it.
and your baby is actually enjoying all this "learning" time.
for us practising early education makes my husband and i realize that if not for the book, we wouldnt know what to play with the baby. What game is most appropriate and in sync with her progress that month.
And besides our baby loves it!

I am definitely going to blog more on early education. until then, for pregnant mothers out there, start researching on this, and you will be doing yourselves and your babies the biggest favor!huge!

and besides, who better to be our child's first teacher but us!
and look up Glenn Doman! he is an advocate of infants ability to learn.
start educating your babies using methods that has been studied and approved by these experts. As Dr Ludington-Hoe wrote in her book, this has got nothing about inheriting clever genes from the parents. This are researched, tested and approved methods!

Athough, should you still believe in the gene pool bit,
my girl got it from her momma!hehehhhehe

My birth story : my first born Part 2

Lets continue from where we left off
The doctor insisted on giving me pitocin despite my objection. He said its not an option since the baby has already pooped.
I was then strapped to the ECG machine. I had asked to let me walk around because I dont want to deal with the contraction lying down on the bed.
The doctor refuses since my water was already broken.
I had no choice but to go through contraction on the bed. So I chose the best option available, laboring on my left side. they nurse did ask me to turn on my back for VE and delivery and boy did it hurt! Im telling you, labor on your side .i dont know how women endure contraction on their backs!madness!

I then asked husband to get the nurse to teach him to read the ECG lines so we can be left alone and husband would know should the baby gets stressed.
At this point the pain was about a minute apart. The nurse offered me Pethidine to which i quickly said no. I wanted my baby to come under no effect of painkiller whatsoever.

So we were left alone and had our mcD bubur ayam n nuggets in the labor room.best gila doctor was so cool x kisah kitorang makan2. and i listened to surah alquran on the mp3. hypnobirth tip:listen to relaxation music that u have been listening over n over/familiar with. you will get the cd along with the book. only i chose to listen to surah alquran that i am familiar with and has been reading over n over. which is surah maryam. husband felt smart and downloaded a different surah in the mp3.i swear i was so angry at him.tip:please remind your husband to follow instruction and dont simply decide for listening material during labor.he's not the one popping babies ye!

at one point the pain was so intense i was sure i was at least 6 cm dilated. Called the nurse and ask her to do VE, although initially i did not want VE and even the nurses did not insist on it. but i was a bit mental at this point hahahah
and she said i was 4cm on.four? just four? heck, bring on the pethidine!i said.
i do regret taking it tho cos the pain didnt lessen one bit!

At some point the pain was intense that i lost track of my breathing so husband stood beside me the whole time, guiding my breathing and applying pressure.he just stood there for hours! while at the same time checking the baby's heartbeat. i tell you.that guy is a great birth partner, no question!

Well, I was birthing on my own when the nurse came in and saw baby was already crowning. i was fully dilated.So she alerted the doctor and pleaded me to push the baby out before the doctor came and force me to push. now, i did not want to push until i really feel the urge.I was relaxly breathing the baby down.

I remembered reading somewhere that once you start talking and thinking craziest thoughts, Most likely youre fully dilated.true enough, that was my cue. hypnobirth suggest you not to talk to save energy. so i had this crazy thought in my head. Looked at my mom on my left (yes, besides husband, my mom was there with me the whole time too.yay!) and thought how could she do this for ten times! and looked at my husband, if i hadnt slept with him this wouldnt have happened! why did i do this to myself!why didnt i just opt for ceasarean!why didnt i take epidural!hahahahah im telling you.those were the pain talking! dont believe any of it.but dont brush it aside either, cos thats actually your cue to being fully dilated! but most importantly dont talk cos itll definitely take energy out of you.

At 2.45 the doctor came in, chewing gum, no less! Ask me to quickly push the baby out "lemas nanti!" i lost my hypno what not, pushed, felt the ring of fire, got episiotomy, which hurt like hell despite people "tak rasa pun", and at 2.47am the baby came.

it was kelamkabut towards the end that i forgot to ask the doctor to let husband cut the umbilical cord. I didnt even get to bond with the baby straight away cos she was put under observation due to the pooping. oh but husband (super birth partner yooo!)held the camcorder the whole time and took the labor and delivery video. the doctor was so cool allowing us to record!

I asked the doctor to be released the same day but he insisted i stayed another day since my 2 day one night package wasnt yet used up.pffft. i hate hospitals.regardless how comfortable!
oh and the best part was turn out baby was perfectly fine. she was not stressed at all the whole time and came out relaxed. Baby didnt cry straight away and the doctor didnt mind. no smacking of the butt and all. i guess as long as she was breathing fine, shouldnt be a problem.

was discharged the next day, and mommyhood began!